Why I Wish I'd Learned How to Learn Earlier

I would finish a book and realize most of its content had already slipped away. Even with notes and highlights, most of it still disappeared, as if I’d never read it at all. Instead of searching for better methods, I doubled down on the wrong ones: more highlights, new note-taking systems, endless tweaks, all without progress.

Schools do a decent job of teaching us what to learn: grammar, equations, historical dates, the endless vocabulary lists. But almost no one ever sits us down to explain how learning itself actually works: what the brain needs, what habits matter, what traps to avoid.

Looking back, what frustrates me is that the tools for effective learning already existed. I simply didn’t know them. No one had ever taught me the basic science of how the brain learns. If I had discovered those principles earlier, I could have spared myself years of trial, error, and frustration.

That’s why Barbara Oakley’s Learning How to Learn struck such a chord with me. One of the most popular online courses globally, it has reached millions and for good reason. Even though the production feels dated now, it explains clearly and practically what schools rarely do.

What I Wish I'd Known About Learning

Oakley’s course distils decades of neuroscience and cognitive psychology into principles that anyone can apply.

Here are the 10 rules I wish I’d known earlier. Some of these ideas may sound obvious, but I guarantee they’re not how most of us were taught to study. The power lies in applying them deliberately and turning unconscious habits into conscious tools. Think of them less as tips and more as playbook. Together they can change the way you approach a subject, from mastering a new language to picking up a new skill later in life.

1. Use focused and diffused thinking. Learning doesn’t happen in a straight line. The brain toggles between two modes:

• Focused mode: effortful, precise, narrow (solving a math problem, practicing scales, memorizing vocabulary).

• Diffused mode: relaxed, associative, big-picture (walking, showering, drifting toward sleep).

Both are essential. Dalí would doze holding a key; when it dropped, he woke just in time to capture diffused insights. The lesson: work in focused bursts, then step away. A walk, nap, or pause often unlocks what brute force cannot.

2. Chunk knowledge into units. Working memory holds only about four items. Grouping them into meaningful “chunks” makes complex problems manageable. In language learning, that means grouping words by theme (“fruits and vegetables”), memorizing phrases (“Je m’appelle…”), or practicing sentence templates (“I would like…”). Chunks become ready-made units you can recall and use instantly.

3. Rely on recall, not review. Re-reading or highlighting creates the illusion of learning. Instead, close the book and retrieve ideas: test yourself, write down the main points, or explain them aloud (try the Feynman Technique: see sidebar). Recall in different settings, for example on a walk or in another room to strengthen memory without cues.

4. Test yourself constantly. Flashcards, quizzes, and practice problems don’t just test you, they reveal gaps and keep overconfidence in check. Handwriting your questions and answers (instead of typing) engages more of the brain and builds stronger memory traces.

5. Space your practice. Cramming builds sandcastles; spacing lays bricks. Review on day 1, day 3, day 7, then weekly. Like muscles, brains grow with consistent, shorter workouts rather than marathons.

6. Mix it up (interleaving). Don’t just drill one type of problem but mix related types and approaches. It feels harder, but the struggle deepens learning by teaching both how and when to apply a skill. In math, alternate algebra, geometry, and word problems. In languages, blend vocabulary, reading, listening, writing, and conversation. And always rework your mistakes because that’s where real progress happens.

7. Rest, sleep, and take breaks. Stepping away allows diffused thinking to work in the background. Sleep literally consolidates memory. Studying before bed or even dreaming about a subject can boost retention.

8. Beat procrastination with small starts. Starting a hard task lights up the brain’s pain centers, but the discomfort fades once you begin. The antidote: just start. Use the Pomodoro technique: 25 minutes of focused work, no interruptions, then a reward.

9. Engage multiple modes and teach it forward. Switch input channels: read, write, listen, draw. Nothing deepens knowledge like explaining it to someone else or letting them challenge you. Analogies (“electricity flows like water”) make abstract ideas stick.

10. Focus with intention and purpose. Eliminate distractions and tackle your hardest task first (“eat the frog”). Work in short, focused sprints to build momentum. When motivation dips, use “mental contrast”: remind yourself where you started and what your effort could unlock.

Why This Still Matters for the Next Generation

As I watch my twin daughters move through school and see the same with the children of friends, I notice a gap. They’re absorbing plenty of content in math, reading, and science, but receive almost no explicit instruction in how to learn.

And it hasn’t changed much since my own school days. Curricula remain overloaded, exams dominate incentives, and teachers rarely have the training or time to integrate metacognitive strategies. It’s not bad intent; it’s a systems issue.

That’s why Oakley and her team created a second course designed for younger learners, Learning How to Learn for Youth. I’d recommend parents take it alongside their kids. The lessons are simple enough for children, but powerful enough to reshape how anyone approaches study and skill-building.

And the truth is, this isn’t just about kids. These gaps matter just as much (maybe more) once we’re out of school.

Beyond School: Learning as a Life Skill

The deeper I go into this, the more I realize: learning how to learn is not just about surviving exams. It’s about navigating a life of constant reinvention.

• Work. The career ladder is gone. We no longer climb predictable rungs; we move through shifting portfolios of projects, skills, and ventures. Curiosity and adaptability now matter more than static career planning. The people who thrive are those who can repeatedly learn, unlearn, and reimagine what’s possible.

• Technology. AI is accelerating the shift. As Kevin Weil of OpenAI put it: “Every product, every service, every device we use today was built pre-AI. They’re all going to be reinvented.” This isn’t a distant prediction; we’re already seeing the disruption. Stanford economist Erik Brynjolfsson calls it the fastest labour market transformation since COVID. Dario Amodei of Anthropic warns that AI could wipe out half of all entry-level white-collar jobs within five years, with unemployment spikes to 20% in exposed sectors. In just the past year, AI-vulnerable occupations have already seen a 13% decline in employment.

• Entrepreneurship. For over a century, schools prepared kids to be employees: take tests, follow directions, earn a salary. But that world is evaporating. The future won’t reward job seekers, it will reward opportunity creators. The entrepreneurs who build tools that amplify human potential instead of replacing it will shape the next economy.

• Health. Every year, new research rewrites what we think we know about the body and brain. To stay healthy, we have to stay learners.

And here’s the encouraging part: the brain science that helps a twelve-year-old with algebra also helps a fifty-year-old adapt to AI, or a seventy-year-old pick up a new language.

If anything, learning how to learn is a form of resilience. It spares us from the despair of “I’m just not good at languages” or “I’m too old for this.” It replaces that with the empowering knowledge that our brains remain plastic. They can grow, change, and adapt if we train them the right way.

Coming Full Circle

Looking back, I can’t help but wonder how different my path, especially with languages and books, might have been if I’d known these strategies earlier. Instead of frustration, perhaps joy. Instead of trial and error, traction.

But maybe that’s the point: not regret, but reinvention. I now use these tools in my work, share them with my daughters, and remind myself that the most important skill is the one that underlies all others: the ability to learn itself.

Now, when I close a book, I don’t just let its ideas vanish. I try to practice recall, chunking, and teaching it forward and the pages stay with me.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in your own learning, or noticed your kids struggling, I’d love to hear how you’ve approached it. Do you have techniques that work for you? What do you wish you had learned earlier?

The Feynman Technique - The Ultimate Guide to Learning Faster

Richard Feynman, Nobel Prize–winning physicist, believed:
“If you can’t explain something in simple terms, you don’t understand it.”
His four-step technique is a powerful way to learn deeply and retain knowledge. It’s not about memorizing, it’s about clarity.

1. Select a concept & map your knowledge
   Choose a specific topic and start with a blank page. Write down everything you already know about it, then add new insights in a different colour as you learn more. This way you build a visual map of your growing understanding.

2. Explain it to a 12-year-old
   Put the concept into simple, jargon-free language, as if you were teaching it to a child. If you stumble, you’ve uncovered a gap in your knowledge. Writing it out forces clarity. It organizes your thinking, exposes weaknesses, and makes ideas stick

3. Review & refine
   Go back over your explanation and notice where it feels fuzzy or incomplete. Return to the source material to study those weak spots, then rewrite your explanation until it flows clearly and simply.

4. Test & archive
   Try teaching the concept to a peer, a child, or even an imaginary audience without using notes. If your explanation holds, you’ve mastered it. Save your refined version in a notebook or binder so you can revisit it later and reinforce your understanding.

Why it works

• Turns passive reading into active learning

• Exposes “illusory competence” (thinking you understand when you don’t).

• Builds simple mental models for faster recall.

• Creates confidence by making the complex accessible.

“The person who says he knows what he thinks but cannot express it usually does not know what he thinks.” — Mortimer Adler

The Feynman Technique is universal, whether you’re learning physics, languages, business, or coding. Mastery comes not from sounding smart, but from making it simple.